I have a French female friend. Very chic. Very polite. Well-mannered and all. She comes from a good family and would never use dirty words. Well, not until she came to me the other day:
Friend: You know I lost it with an Australian couple the other day.
Me: Oh really, what happened?
Friend: Well, they were talking about France and how horrible French people are!
Me: Oh I see, so that’s why you lost it. But honey, you know everyone thinks we’re horrible, we just have to deal with it.
Friend: No, it’s not what made me lose it. So at first I asked them why they thought we were horrible and they said we didn’t work and were just a lazy bunch who were better at complaining than working.
Me: Oh my, I can’t believe Australians are saying that when we ALL know how THEY never work and stay on the beach all day! I understand why you lost it!
Friend: No, that wasn’t what made me lose it! Then they said that French women spent their working days painting their nails and putting make up on.
Me: Well, I’m understand that as a French hard-working woman, that made you really mad!
Friend: Well, wait, that wasn’t what made me mad, I mean it’s important to look pretty at work.
Me: So what made you so mad that you actually threw a fit at them?
Friend: You are never going to believe it. It’s so rude and unfair.
Me: Oh my god, did they complain again that the French won’t speak English?
Friend: No, worse!
Me: I don’t know, did they say that Paris was completely overrated?
Friend: No, Paris IS overrated.
Me: I don’t know, JUST TELL ME FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!
Friend: They said that French baguettes were gross and French bread in general was tasteless.
Me: What???? No!!! They didn’t. Oh how dare they?
Friend: yes, I simply told them to piss off and leave if they were not happy.
She leaves the room, mumbling… “baguettes tasteless…pfffff”
Filed under: Life of a Frog |